When do we know that we have completely accepted something?
Do we ever move on from broken relationships, sour friendships, cheating partners or hurtful colleagues?
I believed that I had moved on pretty well from my divorce. I believed that I had put everything in the past away and nothing could come back and haunt me or effect me anymore. I
I was wrong!
I recently went on a holiday to a state that my in-laws belong to. There was no hidden agenda, it's just a really beautiful place and it did not make any sense to leave it out of the radar just because you have broken relationships with people who belong from there. Also, I had moved on remember! So it did not matter whether it had any strings attached to broken guitars (relationships).
The 1st day I arrived there, we went on our site seeing and were starving by the time we got back. We decided to get some lunch at a local place that was serving lunch meals. We were short on cash, but the owner was a really sweet lady who agreed to serve us even though we didn't have enough cash to pay her. The gesture was heart warming. The food arrived with some rice and 3 different curries, fish, etc.
I ate the 1st bite of food and almost instantaneously tears started pouring out of my eyes. The next moment I found myself sobbing. My friend was a bit shocked and perplexed to see what was happening.
Why was I crying? What brought the tears? It was the food. The food was exactly the way my mom-in-law used to make it. I loved her cooking. I loved her, more importantly. And that day I learned something new. That I still love her.
My friend made this statement which I realised was the ultimate truth. She said "you've moved on from husband, but not from your mum-in-law. You still love her." It took me a while to process what she had said, but it was true. It was really hard to break ties with her just because I wasn't her daughter-in-law anymore. It was confusing for her and I didn't want to be the reason for her misery.
I realised that we never really, completely accept the truth and move on. Some parts of a relationship still remain in our sub-conscious and there could be any sort of a trigger that could jog your memory and bring it all back.
But, I am glad I made that trip. Apart from being a really nice place for site seeing, it turned out to be a journey of emotional enlightenment. It was a journey of accepting the new truth. A hard truth. But truth nevertheless.
Do we ever move on from broken relationships, sour friendships, cheating partners or hurtful colleagues?
I believed that I had moved on pretty well from my divorce. I believed that I had put everything in the past away and nothing could come back and haunt me or effect me anymore. I
I was wrong!
I recently went on a holiday to a state that my in-laws belong to. There was no hidden agenda, it's just a really beautiful place and it did not make any sense to leave it out of the radar just because you have broken relationships with people who belong from there. Also, I had moved on remember! So it did not matter whether it had any strings attached to broken guitars (relationships).
The 1st day I arrived there, we went on our site seeing and were starving by the time we got back. We decided to get some lunch at a local place that was serving lunch meals. We were short on cash, but the owner was a really sweet lady who agreed to serve us even though we didn't have enough cash to pay her. The gesture was heart warming. The food arrived with some rice and 3 different curries, fish, etc.
I ate the 1st bite of food and almost instantaneously tears started pouring out of my eyes. The next moment I found myself sobbing. My friend was a bit shocked and perplexed to see what was happening.
Why was I crying? What brought the tears? It was the food. The food was exactly the way my mom-in-law used to make it. I loved her cooking. I loved her, more importantly. And that day I learned something new. That I still love her.
My friend made this statement which I realised was the ultimate truth. She said "you've moved on from husband, but not from your mum-in-law. You still love her." It took me a while to process what she had said, but it was true. It was really hard to break ties with her just because I wasn't her daughter-in-law anymore. It was confusing for her and I didn't want to be the reason for her misery.
I realised that we never really, completely accept the truth and move on. Some parts of a relationship still remain in our sub-conscious and there could be any sort of a trigger that could jog your memory and bring it all back.
But, I am glad I made that trip. Apart from being a really nice place for site seeing, it turned out to be a journey of emotional enlightenment. It was a journey of accepting the new truth. A hard truth. But truth nevertheless.
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